Mild Dermatographia

Wide Shoes

life rant

I have wide feet. Not super wide. I’d argue barely any larger than a D on the brannock scale. But regardless of my ever so slight statistical aberration, no shoes fit me. Every single pair pinches my little toe inwards. They cause my toes to hammer when walking to avoid discomfort.

My father said that my feet are the same width as his, and his fit in normal shoes, so I must just be oversensitive. I had to point out that he has hammertoes from a lifetime of trying to fit into shoes that are too narrow.

For the last 2-3 months, I’ve been shopping for a pair of shoes that fit. I tried three different sizes of minimus trial runners from New Balance, all in their “wide” (E) width. I put wide in quotes because their toe boxes were all too narrow. I tried New Balance’s 574 in X-Wide (4E). The toe box was crushing. I tried their 1500 sprinters in wide as well, they were basically the same width. I ordered Vivobarefoot shoes a half-size up from recommended. Still too narrow of a toe box. I ordered Wilding Tanukis a size up. They’re supposed to follow the same of your foot. Nope, still too narrow.

I’ve gone nuclear and ordered a pair of Softstair Shoes Primal Runamocs. I swear if these clown shoes are still somehow too small in the toebox, I’m going to wear sandals for the rest of my life.

I’m sick of how unscientific and unempirical shoes are (or rather, clothing in general, a topic for another day). I hate that most companies make shoes in a single width, but multiple lengths. I hate that their toeboxes are so narrow because it’s fashionable or steeped in some historical mistake. I hate how thick and spongy their soles are. I just want a pair of shoes that does their bloody job; fit my feet and protect me from stabby things.

Oh, and I especially hate how no local stores in a mid-sized Canadian city seem to carry wide widths, including stores dedicated to shoes. I hate that I need to spend extra on shipping and duties and returns. I hate wasting so much time waiting for another pair of shoes to come in, only for them to (surprise surprise) be too narrow, and I have to return them, then wait a month for them to reimburse me.